Saturday, August 6, 2011

Healing Takes Time

My broken right shoulder is S.L.O.W.L.Y healing - with daily exercises, physical therapy, and TONS of patience. I still have limitations on my movements but it's getting better. When they first told me it would be two months before I would be out of a sling, I seriously thought they were joking, but...they weren't.  When they told me it would be at least 12 weeks before I started strength training - well, they weren't kidding about that either.  I'm simply amazed at how long these kinds of injuries take to heal! Everywhere I go I also hear "broken arm/shoulder" stories that makes me wince all over again. I truly know it could've been a lot worse. I say a prayer for those who are injured, it's no picnic.

I had my gallbladder surgery on July 27th, and for being an "easy" surgery, it hurt like heck. I've never had a worse medical experience. Healing from that has been slow going as well, and the pain in my upper right abdominal area has happened since it's been taken out, which was nothing short of depressing after the hell that was that operation. My diet needs to transform, I get it finally (at least I'm trying to!).  I'm seriously going to miss chili cheese dogs, hamburgers, spicy foods and pizza. Not that I ate those regularly, but darn, once in awhile some things are a treat. No more. No more... sob...

We also lost my dear Father In Law to lung cancer on July 15th.  We knew he was very ill, the end was very hard on him and everybody, nobody wanted to let go.  That's because he was such a wonderful and loving person, someone who truly, undeniably, made this world a better place with his presence. We miss him terribly and always will. I panicked that I wouldn't be able to handle the funeral day feeling as weak and pain ridden as I did, but I went and was so glad I made it. He was "all about family", and I realized having loved ones together makes the tough times easier to bear, especially since he LOVED having everyone together. I know he was totally smiling down on all of us.

With the shoulder injury, my usual "soul soothing salve" (Knitting) was off limits until very recently. I think I was going through more than I realized (depression) because I was buying yarn like nobody's business and all the time wondering if I would ever knit again! I actually stopped and bought yarn the weekend we went for the funeral at the LYS in their town. The color of this Noro grabbed me and made my heart pitter patter and want to cast on ASAP. The love couldn't be denied, the feeling of it moving through my fingers was mesmerizing. I can't even say how wonderful it felt to finally have my needles working their magic on my soul. I didn't realize until then how much I had truly missed it.  How much I NEEDED it to soothe my fears, worries, and just life stuff.

So here are my Comeback Mitts:

Pattern: Fetching
Yarn: Noro Shirakaba
Mods: Went down a needle size from the pattern to size them down a bit. Also only cast on 40. Worked an extra cable or so on the top for added length.  Love. Love. Love.

Since then I've been knitting a bit every single day and feeling a bit better with each stitch. (and the worry over all the recently acquired yarn isn't as bad...) My knitting friends, and my wonderful family have helped me beyond words get through everything recently too. I'm so very grateful for them.

"Knit on, with confidence and hope, through all crises" ~ Elizabeth Zimmerman



Prairie Rose said...

Oh, Dawn.
My heart is aching for the pain that you and your family has/is going through.
I am thinking and praying for you all daily.
AND to not be able to soothe your soul with knitting!!
Just last night I was awake tossing and turning,worrying myself about something, I finally got up and knit it out.
I am so glad that you can finally knit.
I pray that rays of sunshine start to shine in your life soon.
You are such a strong woman,Dawn.

Beth said...

You had a horrible month. I know what you mean about funerals, I get this awful feeling in the pit of my stomach and want it to be over. So glad you can knit again. Perhaps you can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Knitting helped bring me out of my depression. And the mitts are beau-ti-ful!!

Anna said...

I'm so sorry to hear you've been going through some rough times. I'm glad to hear you can knit again, though. That's always calming. ((HUGS)) If you ever want to chat, you know where to find me!

Yarn Dependent Me said...

sending lots of loves.

Lap Dog Knits said...

How's the healing going????
It's a new month, you're in my thoughts for a wonderful September with lots of yarns and needles and new fun patterns..

I'm sending a bouquet of flowers and a nice cold glass of lemonade today to begin the day!